#THe Singers Tale – Creativity & Ageing – Recordings. Heroin. Skin side out.©

Skin-side out – Heroin Carol Grimes.©

Poems, addiction, pain and denial.

Tracks made by Mark Hewins and Carol Grimes


Annihilate me.

Numb my mind.

Fill my veins with a smoke screen.

Drip Drip Drip  feed me.

Let it slowly take me to a warm soft and silent place.

I do not recognise this hand.

My body was in pain.

Now my mind is indifferent.

I do not care where I am.

       Abandon me here.

                I am warm.  

I taste no tears. I feel no, I feel no – 

I feel nothing. 

 I am sinking into dark dark velvet  in a silent ecstasy.

Outside has no meaning.   

  Inside I am hollow.

My bones soft. All senses blurred .

I exist in tenebrous light.

Suspended, held in slow motion. 

I do not recognise this hand. 

Here in this impenetrable place, alone.

 I celebrate, looking with sleepy eyes – 

through smoked glass 

At last. I am at peace.

I do not recognise these hands.

Skinside out.

Shhhh- Don’t look. 

Inside out-the skin is inside out.

Outside the skin are other eyes, see those eyes, 

see those eyes looking for the inside. close the eyes,

hide, hide from the eyes, on the outside looking in.

Skin side out, the skin is inside out inside out, the skin is inside out.

outside is everything, outside is everyone,

outside is too hot, outside is too cold,  inside lies the unborn,

outside is dying.

Skinside out, the skin is inside out.

Outside in, you can impale a heart, break a heart.

Outside confusion, hullabaloo out of me, out of mind, and out there.

Inside lie shadows to hide in, inside out outside the skin is out there.

Outside the skin is out there.

Let me in, I’m out here let me in, I’m out here.

Skinside out, the skin is inside out.

Outside in, within the walls of skin and bone,

intestines coil and spit sits behind the teeth and lips,  

bile in the spleen squeezes in between the cracks  on the scars

on the skin.  

inside it is warm, and red blood pumps life inside –

beating, beating. 

Outside in lies the wind, a howl in the ears appearing to pierce the skin, 

drum the skin, inside in, the heat, on concrete slides inside, through a split in the face, I need ice to freeze the disease.

So, so, so, so, so, so – close the door when you leave. 

Skin side out – skin side out.

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